43. Good Conduct and Manners

٤٣۔ كتاب الأدب

43.131 Regarding honoring one's parents

٤٣۔١٣١ باب فِي بِرِّ الْوَالِدَيْنِ

abudawud:5137Muḥammad b. Kathīr > Sufyān > Suhayl b. Abū Ṣāliḥ from his father > Abū Hurayrah

A son does not repay what he owes to his father unless he buys him and emancipates him if he finds him in slavery.  

أبو داود:٥١٣٧حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ كَثِيرٍ أَخْبَرَنَا سُفْيَانُ قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي سُهَيْلُ بْنُ أَبِي صَالِحٍ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ قَالَ

قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ لاَ يَجْزِي وَلَدٌ وَالِدَهُ إِلاَّ أَنْ يَجِدَهُ مَمْلُوكًا فَيَشْتَرِيَهُ فَيُعْتِقَهُ  

abudawud:5138Musaddad > Yaḥyá > Ibn Abū Dhiʾb > Khālī al-Ḥārith > Ḥamzah b. ʿAbdullāh b. ʿUmar from his father

A woman was my wife and I loved her, but Umar hated her. He said to me: Divorce her, but I refused. Umar then went to the Prophet ﷺ and mentioned that to him. The Prophet ﷺ said: Divorce her.  

أبو داود:٥١٣٨حَدَّثَنَا مُسَدَّدٌ حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى عَنِ ابْنِ أَبِي ذِئْبٍ قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي خَالِي الْحَارِثُ عَنْ حَمْزَةَ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عُمَرَ عَنْ أَبِيهِ قَالَ

كَانَتْ تَحْتِي امْرَأَةٌ وَكُنْتُ أُحِبُّهَا وَكَانَ عُمَرُ يَكْرَهُهَا فَقَالَ لِي طَلِّقْهَا فَأَبَيْتُ فَأَتَى عُمَرُ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ فَذَكَرَ ذَلِكَ لَهُ فَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ طَلِّقْهَا  

abudawud:5139Muḥammad b. Kathīr > Sufyān > Bahz b. Ḥakīm from his father from his grandfather

I said: Messenger of Allah! to whom should I show kindness? He replied: Your mother, next your mother, next your mother, and then comes your father, and then your relatives in order of relationship. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: If a man asks his slave whom he freed for giving him property which is surplus with him and he refuses to give it to him, the surplus property which he refused to give will be called on the Day of resurrection as a large bald snake. Abu Dawud said: Aqra' means a snake whose hair of the head were removed on account of poison.  

أبو داود:٥١٣٩حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ كَثِيرٍ أَخْبَرَنَا سُفْيَانُ عَنْ بَهْزِ بْنِ حَكِيمٍ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنْ جَدِّهِ قَالَ

قُلْتُ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَنْ أَبَرُّ قَالَ أُمَّكَ ثُمَّ أُمَّكَ ثُمَّ أُمَّكَ ثُمَّ أَبَاكَ ثُمَّ الأَقْرَبَ فَالأَقْرَبَ وَقَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ لاَ يَسْأَلُ رَجُلٌ مَوْلاَهُ مِنْ فَضْلٍ هُوَ عِنْدَهُ فَيَمْنَعُهُ إِيَّاهُ إِلاَّ دُعِيَ لَهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ فَضْلُهُ الَّذِي مَنَعَهُ شُجَاعًا أَقْرَعَ  

قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ الأَقْرَعُ الَّذِي ذَهَبَ شَعْرُ رَأْسِهِ مِنَ السُّمِّ
abudawud:5140Muḥammad b. ʿĪsá > al-Ḥārith b. Murrah > Kulayb b. Manfaʿah from his father

Messenger of Allah! to whom should I show kindness? He said: Your mother, your sister, your brother and the slave whom you set free and who is your relative, a due binding (on you), and a tie of relationship which should be joined.  

أبو داود:٥١٤٠حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ عِيسَى حَدَّثَنَا الْحَارِثُ بْنُ مُرَّةَ حَدَّثَنَا كُلَيْبُ بْنُ مَنْفَعَةَ عَنْ جَدِّهِ

أَنَّهُ أَتَى النَّبِيَّ ﷺ فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَنْ أَبَرُّ قَالَ أُمَّكَ وَأَبَاكَ وَأُخْتَكَ وَأَخَاكَ وَمَوْلاَكَ الَّذِي يَلِي ذَاكَ حَقٌّ وَاجِبٌ وَرَحِمٌ مَوْصُولَةٌ  

abudawud:5141[Chain 1] Muḥammad b. Jaʿfar b. Ziyād [Chain 2] ʿAbbād b. Mūsá > Ibrāhīm b. Saʿd from his father > Ḥumayd b. ʿAbd al-Raḥman > ʿAbdullāh b. ʿAmr

A man’s reviling of his parents is one of the grave sins. He was asked : Messenger of Allah! How does a man revile his parents? He replied: He reviles the father of a man who then reviles his father, and he reviles a man’s mother and he reviles his.  

أبو داود:٥١٤١حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ جَعْفَرِ بْنِ زِيَادٍ وَقَالَ أَخْبَرَنَا ح وَحَدَّثَنَا عَبَّادُ بْنُ مُوسَى قَالاَ حَدَّثَنَا إِبْرَاهِيمُ بْنُ سَعْدٍ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنْ حُمَيْدِ بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو قَالَ

قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ إِنَّ مِنْ أَكْبَرِ الْكَبَائِرِ أَنْ يَلْعَنَ الرَّجُلُ وَالِدَيْهِ قِيلَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ كَيْفَ يَلْعَنُ الرَّجُلُ وَالِدَيْهِ قَالَ يَلْعَنُ أَبَا الرَّجُلِ فَيَلْعَنُ أَبَاهُ وَيَلْعَنُ أُمَّهُ فَيَلْعَنُ أُمَّهُ  

abudawud:5142Ibrāhīm b. Mahdī And ʿUthmān b. Abū Shaybah And Muḥammad b. al-ʿAlāʾ al-Maʿná > ʿAbdullāh b. Idrīs > ʿAbd al-Raḥman b. Sulaymān > Asīd b. ʿAlī b. ʿUbayd a freed slave of Banī Sāʿidah from his father > Abū Usayd Mālik b. Rabīʿah al-Sāʿidī

While we were with the Messenger of Allah! ﷺ a man of Banu Salmah came to Him and said: Messenger of Allah is there any kindness left that I can do to my parents after their death? He replied: Yes, you can invoke blessings on them, forgiveness for them, carry out their final instructions after their death, join ties of relationship which are dependent on them, and honour their friends.  

أبو داود:٥١٤٢حَدَّثَنَا إِبْرَاهِيمُ بْنُ مَهْدِيٍّ وَعُثْمَانُ بْنُ أَبِي شَيْبَةَ وَمُحَمَّدُ بْنُ الْعَلاَءِ الْمَعْنَى قَالُوا حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ اللَّهِ بْنُ إِدْرِيسَ عَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ سُلَيْمَانَ عَنْ أَسِيدِ بْنِ عَلِيِّ بْنِ عُبَيْدٍ مَوْلَى بَنِي سَاعِدَةَ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنْ أَبِي أُسَيْدٍ مَالِكِ بْنِ رَبِيعَةَ السَّاعِدِيِّ قَالَ

بَيْنَا نَحْنُ عِنْدَ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ﷺ إِذَا جَاءَهُ رَجُلٌ مِنْ بَنِي سَلِمَةَ فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ هَلْ بَقِيَ مِنْ بِرِّ أَبَوَىَّ شَىْءٌ أَبَرُّهُمَا بِهِ بَعْدَ مَوْتِهِمَا قَالَ نَعَمِ الصَّلاَةُ عَلَيْهِمَا وَالاِسْتِغْفَارُ لَهُمَا وَإِنْفَاذُ عَهْدِهِمَا مِنْ بَعْدِهِمَا وَصِلَةُ الرَّحِمِ الَّتِي لاَ تُوصَلُ إِلاَّ بِهِمَا وَإِكْرَامُ صَدِيقِهِمَا  

abudawud:5143Aḥmad b. Manīʿ > Abū al-Naḍr > al-Layth b. Saʿd > Yazīd b. ʿAbdullāh b. Usāmah b. al-Hād > ʿAbdullāh b. Dīnār > Ibn ʿUmar

One of the finest acts of kindness is for a man to treat his father’s friends in a kindly way after he has departed.  

أبو داود:٥١٤٣حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ مَنِيعٍ حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو النَّضْرِ حَدَّثَنَا اللَّيْثُ بْنُ سَعْدٍ عَنْ يَزِيدَ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ أُسَامَةَ بْنِ الْهَادِ عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ دِينَارٍ عَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ قَالَ

قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ إِنَّ أَبَرَّ الْبِرِّ صِلَةُ الْمَرْءِ أَهْلَ وُدِّ أَبِيهِ بَعْدَ أَنْ يُوَلِّيَ  

abudawud:5144Ibn al-Muthanná > Abū ʿĀṣim > Jaʿfar b. Yaḥyá b. ʿUmārah b. Thawbān > ʿUmārah b. Thawbān > Abū al-Ṭufayl

I saw the Prophet ﷺ distributing flesh at Ji'irranah, and I was a boy in those days bearing the bone of the camel, and when a woman who came forward approach the Prophet ﷺ, he spread out his cloak for her, and she sat on it. I asked: Who is she? The people said: She is his foster-mother.  

أبو داود:٥١٤٤حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ الْمُثَنَّى حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو عَاصِمٍ قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي جَعْفَرُ بْنُ يَحْيَى بْنِ عُمَارَةَ بْنِ ثَوْبَانَ أَخْبَرَنَا عُمَارَةُ بْنُ ثَوْبَانَ أَنَّ أَبَا الطُّفَيْلِ

أَخْبَرَهُ قَالَ رَأَيْتُ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ يَقْسِمُ لَحْمًا بِالْجِعِرَّانَةِ قَالَ أَبُو الطُّفَيْلِ وَأَنَا يَوْمَئِذٍ غُلاَمٌ أَحْمِلُ عَظْمَ الْجَزُورِ إِذْ أَقْبَلَتِ امْرَأَةٌ حَتَّى دَنَتْ إِلَى النَّبِيِّ ﷺ فَبَسَطَ لَهَا رِدَاءَهُ فَجَلَسَتْ عَلَيْهِ فَقُلْتُ مَنْ هِيَ فَقَالُوا هَذِهِ أُمُّهُ الَّتِي أَرْضَعَتْهُ  

abudawud:5145Aḥmad b. Saʿīd al-Hamdānī > Ibn Wahb > ʿAmr b. al-Ḥārith > ʿUmar b. al-Sāʾib > Balaghah

One day when the Messenger of Allah ﷺ was sitting, his foster-father came forward. He spread out of a part of his garment and he sit on it. Then his mother came forward to him and he spread out the other side of his garment and she sat on it. Again , his foster-brother came forward. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ stood for him and seated him before himself.  

أبو داود:٥١٤٥حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ سَعِيدٍ الْهَمْدَانِيُّ حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ وَهْبٍ قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي عَمْرُو بْنُ الْحَارِثِ أَنَّ عُمَرَ بْنَ السَّائِبِ حَدَّثَهُ أَنَّهُ بَلَغَهُ

أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ كَانَ جَالِسًا يَوْمًا فَأَقْبَلَ أَبُوهُ مِنَ الرَّضَاعَةِ فَوَضَعَ لَهُ بَعْضَ ثَوْبِهِ فَقَعَدَ عَلَيْهِ ثُمَّ أَقْبَلَتْ أُمُّهُ فَوَضَعَ لَهَا شِقَّ ثَوْبِهِ مِنْ جَانِبِهِ الآخَرِ فَجَلَسَتْ عَلَيْهِ ثُمَّ أَقْبَلَ أَخُوهُ مِنَ الرَّضَاعَةِ فَقَامَ لَهُ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ فَأَجْلَسَهُ بَيْنَ يَدَيْهِ