Caution: Translations of Quran and Ḥadīth may lead to possible misapplications and misinterpretations. This site is intended for students of sacred knowledge that are proficient in comprehending classical Arabic and have a strong foundation in Islamic sciences. Also note that religious injunctions rely on several aspects beyond what one may glean through reading individual aḥādīth.
nasai:3349ʿAlī b. Ḥujr b. Iyās b. Muqātil b. Mushamrikh b. Khālid > Ismāʿīl b. Ibrāhīm

"Umar bin Al-Khattab said: 'Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honor and dignity in this world, or a sign of piety before Allah, the Mighty and Sublime, then Muhammad would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives, and none of his daughters were given, more than twelve Uqiyyah. A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her and says: You cost me everything I own ('Alaqul-Qirbah)'" "And I was a man born among the 'Arabs, but I did not know the meaning of 'Alaqul-Qirbah' and others of you are saying -about those killed in this or that battle of yours, or who died: 'So-and-so was martyred' or 'so and so died as a martyr.' While perhaps he merely overloaded the backside of his beast, or lined his saddle with gold or silver seeking trade. So do not say that, rather say as the Prophet said: 'Whoever is killed in the cause of Allah, or dies, then he is in Paradise.'"  

النسائي:٣٣٤٩أَخْبَرَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ حُجْرِ بْنِ إِيَاسِ بْنِ مُقَاتِلِ بْنِ مُشَمْرِخِ بْنِ خَالِدٍ قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا إِسْمَاعِيلُ بْنُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ عَنْ أَيُّوبَ وَابْنِ عَوْنٍ وَسَلَمَةَ بْنِ عَلْقَمَةَ وَهِشَامِ بْنِ حَسَّانَ دَخَلَ حَدِيثُ بَعْضِهِمْ فِي بَعْضٍ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ قَالَ سَلَمَةُ عَنِ ابْنِ سِيرِينَ نُبِّئْتُ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ وَقَالَ الآخَرُونَ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ قَالَ قَالَ

عُمَرُ بْنُ الْخَطَّابِ أَلاَ لاَ تَغْلُوا صُدُقَ النِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّهُ لَوْ كَانَ مَكْرُمَةً فِي الدُّنْيَا أَوْ تَقْوَى عِنْدَ اللَّهِ ﷻ كَانَ أَوْلاَكُمْ بِهِ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ مَا أَصْدَقَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ امْرَأَةً مِنْ نِسَائِهِ وَلاَ أُصْدِقَتِ امْرَأَةٌ مِنْ بَنَاتِهِ أَكْثَرَ مِنْ ثِنْتَىْ عَشْرَةَ أُوقِيَّةً وَإِنَّ الرَّجُلَ لَيُغْلِي بِصَدُقَةِ امْرَأَتِهِ حَتَّى يَكُونَ لَهَا عَدَاوَةٌ فِي نَفْسِهِ وَحَتَّى يَقُولَ كُلِّفْتُ لَكُمْ عَلَقَ الْقِرْبَةِ وَكُنْتُ غُلاَمًا عَرَبِيًّا مُوَلَّدًا فَلَمْ أَدْرِ مَا عَلَقُ الْقِرْبَةِ قَالَ وَأُخْرَى يَقُولُونَهَا لِمَنْ قُتِلَ فِي مَغَازِيكُمْ أَوْ مَاتَ قُتِلَ فُلاَنٌ شَهِيدًا أَوْ مَاتَ فُلاَنٌ شَهِيدًا وَلَعَلَّهُ أَنْ يَكُونَ قَدْ أَوْقَرَ عَجُزَ دَابَّتِهِ أَوْ دَفَّ رَاحِلَتِهِ ذَهَبًا أَوْ وَرِقًا يَطْلُبُ التِّجَارَةَ فَلاَ تَقُولُوا ذَاكُمْ وَلَكِنْ قُولُوا كَمَا قَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ مَنْ قُتِلَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ أَوْ مَاتَ فَهُوَ فِي الْجَنَّةِ  


See similar narrations below:

Collected by Ibn Mājah, Aḥmad, Ibn Ḥibbān, Nasāʾī's Kubrá
ibnmajah:1887[Chain 1] Abū Bakr b. Abū Shaybah > Yazīd b. Hārūn > Ibn ʿAwn [Chain 2] Naṣr b. ʿAlī al-Jahḍamī > Yazīd b. Zurayʿ > Ibn ʿAwn > Muḥammad b. Sīrīn > Abū al-ʿAjfāʾ al-Sulamī > Qāl ʿUmar b. al-Khaṭṭāb Lā Tughālūā Ṣadāq al-Nisāʾ

Abu Ajfa As-Sulami said: “Umar bin Khattab said: 'Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honor and dignity in this world or a sign of Taqwa before Allah, then Muhammad ﷺ would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives and none of his daughters were given more than twelve uqiyyah. A man may increase dowry until he feels resentment against her and says: “You cost me everything I own,” or, “You caused me a great deal of hardship.”'” (Hassan)  

ابن ماجة:١٨٨٧حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو بَكْرِ بْنُ أَبِي شَيْبَةَ حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ هَارُونَ عَنِ ابْنِ عَوْنٍ ح وَحَدَّثَنَا نَصْرُ بْنُ عَلِيٍّ الْجَهْضَمِيُّ حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ زُرَيْعٍ حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ عَوْنٍ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ السُّلَمِيِّ قَالَ قَالَ

عُمَرُ بْنُ الْخَطَّابِ لاَ تُغَالُوا صَدَاقَ النِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّهَا لَوْ كَانَتْ مَكْرُمَةً فِي الدُّنْيَا أَوْ تَقْوًى عِنْدَ اللَّهِ كَانَ أَوْلاَكُمْ وَأَحَقَّكُمْ بِهَا مُحَمَّدٌ ﷺ مَا أَصْدَقَ امْرَأَةً مِنْ نِسَائِهِ وَلاَ أُصْدِقَتِ امْرَأَةٌ مِنْ بَنَاتِهِ أَكْثَرَ مِنِ اثْنَتَىْ عَشْرَةَ أُوقِيَّةً وَإِنَّ الرَّجُلَ لَيُثَقِّلُ صَدَقَةَ امْرَأَتِهِ حَتَّى يَكُونَ لَهَا عَدَاوَةٌ فِي نَفْسِهِ وَيَقُولُ قَدْ كَلِفْتُ إِلَيْكِ عَلَقَ الْقِرْبَةِ أَوْ عَرَقَ الْقِرْبَةِ وَكُنْتُ رَجُلاً عَرَبِيًّا مُوَلَّدًا مَا أَدْرِي مَا عَلَقُ الْقِرْبَةِ أَوْ عَرَقُ الْقِرْبَةِ  

ahmad:340Sufyān > Ayyūb > Ibn Sīrīn Samiʿah from Abū al-ʿAjfāʾisamiʿt ʿUmar > Lā Tughlūā Ṣuduq al-Nisāʾ

I heard ʿUmar say: Do not make womenʿs dowries too expensive, for if it were a sign of honour in this world or a sign of piety in the Hereafter, the most likely of you to do it would have been the Prophet ﷺ. But he did not give any of his daughters in marriage or marry any of his wives for more than twelve Ooqiyyah, Furthermore, you say during your campaigns. So and so was killed as a martyr, So and so died as a martyr, but perhaps he loaded his mountʿs back with gold and silver, hoping to do trade. So do not say that; rather say as Muhammad said: “Whoever died for the sake of Allah is in Paradise.”  

أحمد:٣٤٠حَدَّثَنَا سُفْيَانُ عَنْ أَيُّوبَ عَنِ ابْنِ سِيرِينَ سَمِعَهُ مِنْ أَبِي

الْعَجْفَاءِسَمِعْتُ عُمَرَ يَقُولُ لَا تُغْلُوا صُدُقَ النِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّهَا لَوْ كَانَتْ مَكْرُمَةً فِي الدُّنْيَا أَوْ تَقْوَى فِي الْآخِرَةِ لَكَانَ أَوْلاكُمْ بِهَا النَّبِيُّ ﷺ؛ مَا أَنْكَحَ شَيْئًا مِنْ بَنَاتِهِ وَلا نِسَائِهِ فَوْقَ اثْنَتَيْ عَشْرَةَ أُوقِيَّةًوَأُخْرَى تَقُولُونَهَا فِي مَغَازِيكُمْ قُتِلَ فُلانٌ شَهِيدًا مَاتَ فُلانٌ شَهِيدًا وَلَعَلَّهُ أَنْ يَكُونَ قَدْ أَوْقَرَ عَجُزَ دَابَّتِهِ أَوْ دَفَّ رَاحِلَتِهِ ذَهَبًا وَفِضَّةً يَبْتَغِي التِّجَارَةَ فَلا تَقُولُوا ذَاكُمْ وَلَكِنْ قُولُوا كَمَا قَالَ مُحَمَّدٌ ﷺ مَنْ قُتِلَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللهِ فَهُوَ فِي الْجَنَّةِ  

ذِكْرُ إِيجَابِ الْجَنَّةِ لِمَنْ مَاتَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ حَتْفَ أَنْفِهِ

ibnhibban:4620Aḥmad b. ʿAlī b. al-Muthanná > Abū Khaythamah > Yazīd b. Hārūn > Ibn ʿAwn And Hishām b. Ḥassān > Muḥammad b. Sīrīn > Abū al-ʿAjfāʾ al-Sulamī > Khaṭabanā ʿUmar b. al-Khaṭṭāb

[Machine] "Do not belittle the friendship of women, for if it were a valuable thing in this world or in the sight of Allah, then Muhammad ﷺ would be the most truthful person in terms of his women and daughters. And no woman from his women or daughters would exceed twelve ounces of it. And if you mention someone who was killed in your battles as a martyr, do not say that so-and-so died as a martyr, but say as the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said or as Muhammad ﷺ said: 'Whoever is killed in the cause of Allah or died in the cause of Allah, he is in Paradise."  

ابن حبّان:٤٦٢٠أَخْبَرَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ عَلِيِّ بْنِ الْمُثَنَّى حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو خَيْثَمَةَ حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ هَارُونَ أَخْبَرَنَا ابْنُ عَوْنٍ وَهِشَامُ بْنُ حَسَّانَ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ السُّلَمِيِّ قَالَ خَطَبَنَا عُمَرُ بْنُ الْخَطَّابِ فَقَالَ

أَلَا لَا تَغْلُوا صَدَاقَ النِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّهَا لَوْ كَانَتْ مَكْرُمَةً فِي الدُّنْيَا أَوْ تَقْوَى عِنْدَ اللَّهِ لَكَانَ أَوْلَاكُمْ وَأَحَقُّكُمْ بِهَا مُحَمَّدًا ﷺ مَا أَصْدَقَ امْرَأَةً مِنْ نِسَائِهِ وَلَا امْرَأَةً مِنْ بَنَاتِهِ أَكْثَرَ مِنِ اثْنَتَيْ عَشْرَةَ أُوقِيَّةً وَأُخْرَى تَقُولُونَهَا مَنْ قُتِلَ فِي مَغَازِيكُمْ مَاتَ فُلَانٌ شَهِيدًا فَلَا تَقُولُوا ذَاكَ وَلَكِنْ قُولُوا كَمَا قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ أَوْ كَمَا قَالَ مُحَمَّدٌ ﷺ «مَنْ قُتِلَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ أَوْ مَاتَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ فَهُوَ فِي الْجَنَّةِ»  

nasai-kubra:5485ʿAlī b. Ḥajar b. Iyās b. Muqātil b. Mushamrij b. Khālid > Ismāʿīl b. Ibrāhīm

Abu Ajfa As-Sulami said: “Umar bin Khattab said: 'Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honor and dignity in this world or a sign of Taqwa before Allah, then Muhammad ﷺ would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives and none of his daughters were given more than twelve uqiyyah. A man may increase dowry until he feels resentment against her and says: “You cost me everything I own,” or, “You caused me a great deal of hardship.”'” (Hassan) (Using translation from Ibn Mājah 1887)   

الكبرى للنسائي:٥٤٨٥أَخْبَرَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ حَجَرُ بْنُ إِيَاسُ بْنُ مُقَاتِلِ بْنِ مُشَمْرِجِ بْنِ خَالِدٍ قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا إِسْمَاعِيلُ بْنُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ عَنْ أَيُّوبَ وَابْنُ عَوْنٍ وَسَلَمَةُ بْنُ عَلْقَمَةَ وَهِشَامُ بْنُ حَسَّانَ دَخَلَ حَدِيثُ بَعْضِهِمْ فِي بَعْضٍ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ قَالَ سَلَمَةُ عَنِ ابْنِ سِيرِينَ نُبِّئْتُ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ وَقَالَ الْآخَرُونَ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سِيرِينَ عَنْ أَبِي الْعَجْفَاءِ قَالَ

قَالَ عُمَرُ بْنُ الْخَطَّابِ أَلَا لَا تَغْلُوا صُدُقَ النِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّهُ لَوْ كَانَ مَكْرُمَةً فِي الدُّنْيَا أَوْ تَقْوَى عِنْدَ اللهِ ﷻ كَانَ أَوْلَاكُمْ بِهِ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ مَا أَصَدَقَ رَسُولُ اللهِ ﷺ امْرَأَةً مِنْ نِسَائِهِ وَلَا أُصْدِقَتِ امْرَأَةٌ مِنْ بَنَاتِهِ أَكْثَرَ مِنْ ثِنْتَيْ عَشْرَةَ أُوقِيَّةً وَإِنَّ الرَّجُلَ لَيُغْلِي بِصَدَقَةِ امْرَأَتِهِ حَتَّى يَكُونَ لَهَا عَدَاوَةٌ فِي نَفْسِهِ وَحَتَّى يَقُولَ كُلِّفْتُ لَكُمْ عِلْقَ الْقِرْبَةِ وَكُنْتُ غُلَامًا عَرَبِيًّا مُوَلَّدًا فَلَمْ أَدْرِ مَا عِلْقُ الْقِرْبَةِ؟